Unconventional Choices for Your Family
BY : ANNA BOOTH
“What’s our worst case scenario?”
It’s the question my husband and I were asking ourselves when making a decision about a job he wanted to take with a new ministry in town.
Fast forward 8 months, Dakota jobless, me in nursing school, our first baby 3 months old and moving in with my parents…we were living our “worst” case scenario. And it ended up being our best.
What began as a 6 month decision to co-live turned into 3.5 years. A worldwide pandemic, health struggles for me, job losses, a challenging second pregnancy, and then a surprising third one …living with my parents turned into THE biggest gift. It allowed us to prioritize what mattered most to our family.
I was able to finish nursing school at a part time pace and then walk across the stage holding our daughter. Dakota became a first generation graduate and then chose to stay home with our girl, so I could use my nursing degree. I quit my job to protect my mental health. We fought through a traumatic pregnancy side by side, in and out of the ER. Dakota started weekly counseling in order to heal, and the list goes on. Many of these decisions, maybe even all, would not have been possible had we not been living with my parents. We weren’t stressing about our financial situation which freed us to focus on other things that needed our full attention.
Throughout those almost 4 years, there were times we felt “behind” and had to fight against lies that cultural norms like to feed us. There were seasons of more than enough and seasons of just enough (barely). There was plenty of sacrifice and lots of late nights wondering if we were making the right decisions.
And you know what else there was? Health.
Health of spirit, mind, body, relationship, and family. Every decision we have made has been to prioritize my physical health, our mental health, and the health of our family as a whole.
It hasn’t been easy, but oh has it been rich.
As I write this, I am sitting in Beaufort, South Carolina in my last week of a travel nursing contract. We’ve been here for 9 months, and it has changed us for the better. I have tears in my eyes because as I reflect on those years sharing a home with my parents, I realize all over again that we were exactly where we needed to be. Such formative years that gave us the courage to take the leap of faith into travel nursing, something we have dreamed of pursuing but didn’t know if I would physically be healthy enough for (you can read more of my story with chronic illness here).
Because I was able to prioritize my physical and mental health, I reached a point of feeling like I could actually take on the rigorous schedule of a travel job. So we went for it! Again asking ourselves…”what’s our worst case scenario?” It was only 13 weeks so we knew if it didn’t go well, we could easily head back to Johnson City in 3 months. Worst case scenario is…we tried, and we came back.
You wanna know what happened? We have thrived. Absolutely flourished both individually and collectively. We’ve discovered through conversations with strangers that taking on travel nursing as a family is not “normal”…lots of questions about why we chose to travel with three young kids. Our answer? It’ll only ever get harder, so we went for it now.
We’ve had our share of hard parts, including a hospitalization for our youngest…which led us to really dig in and ask ourselves if the hard parts of this unconventional lifestyle are worth it. Are we willing to say yes to the challenging parts that will inevitably continue? Life keeps happening wherever you’re living, even if you’re living your dream. Our answer was a resounding yes. We have seen the good far outweigh the hard, and until that pendulum swings the other way, you’ll be able to find us on the road.
And far beyond our time on the road, you’ll likely be able to find us living a little unconventionally. Not because there is anything wrong with conventional, but rather because we have seen the fruit that comes with making the tough choices to prioritize what matters most to us. Oftentimes that goes against what society would rather us pursue.
So here’s my love note to you…
It’s okay to do things a little differently. Ask yourself where you want to be five years from now — not location, but where you want to be as a person and as a family. Then make every decision – big or small – to move you towards that.
It might be uncomfortable. It probably will be unconventional. Lean in.
You and those around you will be better for it.
